If you own a cat could you raise your hand? That many? Ok, could all of you just look at the cute kitty picture on the left for a minute? Thanks. We'll let you know when you can come back. Are they all gone? Great.
We need to make some plans because it turns out that cats carry a parasite called Toxoplasma gondii that just might cause a mild form of zombism in humans.
Normally a rat will avoid feline smells. However once it has been infected the rat foolishly seeks out cat odors thus allowing an easy, if messy, way for Toxoplasma gondii to travel back into its preferred pussy breeding ground.
It doesn't stop with cats though. Some scientists have found that this same parasite infects human cat owners and may actually change the personality of the human hosts. Men become jealous and suspicious, women more outgoing and warm. Doctors already warn pregnant women to forgo changing the kitty-litter because of a suspected link between Toxoplasma and schizophrenia in children.
Remember all those people who had their hands raised. When the zombie attacks start make sure you tell your cat hair covered neighbors that they're on their own.
Hey, cat people. You can come back now. We were just talking about how much we like you and your cats. Yes. Animals that poop in the house are adorable. Really.
Cats scratch your eyes out.