Zombies. They're a pain. They're annoying. They aren't going away anytime soon. It's a sad truth-- the epidemic is spreading. Chances are someone you care about will become a zombie.

Tell them how you feel BEFORE they start moaning and shuffling, with our convenient zombie greeting cards. Let them know that if you see their zombified corpse, you'll feel bad when you put a slug through their brainpan.

Because, once they're a zombie, it's too late to say you care... Send a Zombie Card

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Tag >> Politics

Zombie Lincoln for PresidentYou've been asking us.  You've been begging us.  Well, finally Ifyouwereazombie.com is willing to go out on a limb and endorse a candidate for this year's presidential election.  We know, you're surprised.  Given our general approval of zombie eradication  and eagerness for a strong zombie defense, why the heck would we endorse a Zombie Party candidate?

We don't have anything against McCain, Obama or Clinton.  Well, ok we do.  But it isn't personal.  Ok fine.  It is personal.  We simply feel that Zombie Lincoln is a candidate with more integrity, honesty, and braaaains.  That's it.

Sure, the Zombie Party has a huge advertising budget and has been purchasing large blocks of banner ads from major zombie-related web sites.  But that really has nothing to do with this.  The media has a duty to prolong report on the political campaign and provide an outlet for all well-funded political parties to connect with voters.

Vote early.  Vote often.  Vote Zombie Lincoln. .

Still not conviced the zombie threat is real? Take a gander at this video of U.S. Representative John Haller (R-PA, 12th District) reading a heavily censored version of House bill HR8791-- the Homeland "Terrorism" Preparedness Bill. 

Although he did his best, just substitute the word "Zombie" for "classified" and the real purpose of this bill will shine through.  At least we know the government is providing contingency plans. [via bluesnews]

Click through to see a transcript.

Say what you will about the current administration's policies but at least we finally have someone looking out for the common man.

Really, I'm just embarassed by the ignorance of this reporter.  It's obvious that the vast moderate-media conspiracy has a pro-zombie agenda.  First rule of discrediting someone is to pretend they don't make sense.

Wake up America!